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Kicking Anger in the Teeth! (The Secret of Mastering Anger)

We’ve all experienced anger, whether it was a little frustration or an extreme rage.  Anger is a natural emotion that can be healthy, beneficial, or destructive.  It spills out with words that bite like venom.  Anger destroys relationships.  Anger galvanizes politicians, provokes neighborhood recreation boards, and divides families.  

In our nation, anger is an increasing, dominant emotion.  A war of hate is burgeoning at the national level, threading through the corridors of life in states, cities, and homes.  When anger comes to my house, how do I close the door on it? 

DO WHAT IS RIGHT

God gave a directive to Cain, the first son of Adam and Eve, to do what is right and rule over anger, a message still true today.  Here’s the story.  Carefully read the text.

Genesis 4:3-7 In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord.  And Abel also brought an offering—fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The Lord looked with favor on Abel and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast.

Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast?  If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”

Cain was angry that his offering was not acceptable to God.  He was mad that God looked with favor on his brother’s offering.  Jealous, angry, and disobedient, Cain’s anger-fueled pride and arrogance led to further trouble and sin.   He didn’t want God telling him how to bring his offering and hated his favored brother, Abel.   God commended Abel as righteous (Hebrews 11:4). His offering showed his love for God.  Cain’s anger mirrored his cold and disobedient core towards God. His anger led to the murder of his brother Abel.   

God gave Cain the opportunity to do right, but he enjoyed the rush of anger more than the submission of self-control.  His anger surged.  He ignored his parents’ and God’s instructions regarding the right sacrifice offered. He didn’t love God enough to please Him (and he forgot to count to 100!). 

When angry, count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred.  Thomas Jefferson

RULE OVER ANGER

If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it. Genesis 4:7 

God provided a compelling word picture—a tiger crouching in the deep grass ready to pounce.  If you’re the one staring the tiger in the eyes, you best choose wisely. 

Anger, like a tiger crouching, is ready to have you.   Take charge before it attacks!  Rule over it!  Shut the door!

             Sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.

Crouching Tiger

Sin is always ready to “have” us.  It’s waiting for the opportune time to pounce.  When someone pushes our buttons, there’s a fight in us.  We want to get even, dish it out, take the first shot, give her a piece of my mind. That is the time we must rule over it, or it will rule us.  

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?  You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet, but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God (James 4:1, 2).

Cain’s anger cost him his place in the family, his brother’s life, and God’s presence (Genesis 4:14).   If Cain ruled over his anger, his destiny would have been sweet.

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.  Mark Twain

HELP OF THE HOLY SPIRIT

God’s Word is complete in being the answer to all our needs.  It’s the directions we seek, the guidance for right relationships.  The God who made us knows how we “tick.”  When we choose to “rule over anger,” the Holy Spirit will help.   Self-control, a fruit of the Spirit,  kicks in and becomes stronger with resolve (Galatians 5:23-24).“Do the right thing” and “rule over it.”  It’s a choice of will—to please the flesh, or to please God.

           Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh                        desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set                       on what the Spirit desires  (Romans 8:5).

Ephesians 4:26-32 tells how to rule over anger:

  1. When angry, don’t sin.  Don’t let emotions lead; rule over them quickly.  (Ephesians 4:26, 27).
  2. Keep your words gentle. They turn away wrath (Proverbs 15:1).
  3. Control your tongue (James 3:6, 9-11).
  4. Don’t grieve the Holy Spirit by your response (Ephesians 4: 30-31).
  5. Forgive and be kind (Ephesians 4: 32).  Jesus exemplifies the ideal for us.  “Father, forgive them (scourged him, jeered, forsook, insulted, spit on him, nailed his hands and feet) for they don’t know what they do” (Luke 23:34).

I can control anger when I DO WHAT IS RIGHT, RULE OVER IT, and yield to the HELP OF THE HOLY SPIRIT.

Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.  Proverbs 16:32

Cain grieved the Holy Spirit when he disregarded God’s directive to “do the right thing.”  If flesh leads, sin is crouching at the door; words can’t be unsaid, actions can’t be undone.   If we yield to the Holy Spirit, we can dominate anger.  

Doing what is right, ruling over emotions, and yielding to the Holy Spirit will help conquer anger and will generate words and behaviors that please God.    

PREPARE AHEAD OF TIME

When anger comes to your house, don’t invite it in.  Determine ahead of time to close the door. If need be, kick anger in the teeth!   The Holy Spirit will help do the right thing and strengthen the inner man/woman to rule over it. 

Prayer:  Lord, thank you for the gift of emotions.  Help me honor you in the way I control anger.   When surprised by anger, help me, Holy Spirit—with self-control, compassion, and wisdom— to resolve the situation.  Help me understand.  Help me forgive.  In Jesus’ name, Amen!

You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived.  But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Colossians 3:7-9

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